I Apparently Pissed Off Someone Tonight...

"Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies" (jordanwphillips) 04/10/2016 at 19:59 • Filed to: Slight Rant

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There is a road near me that has a few miles of unpaved section, and no one lives on the unpaved gravel section. Tonight I was driving slightly spiritedly (No high speeds, I barely reached 40), and drifted a couple of long curves. The curves are clear, and long enough that I could be 100% certain that no one was coming or was near the road(why would they be, no one lives there). I was doing no more than 25 while doing this, so I was in 100% control and could quickly and safely stop if need be. Plus, it’s not like I was trying to chain drifts together, as it was like a mini drift from a throttle blip. Anyway, the paved section was coming up, so I behaved myself from then on. 4 houses down, dude comes flailing his arms and screaming at me down his driveway. There is no way he saw me, so I just assume he heard me through the woods. Whatever. There was no one to hurt except myself, and I’ve done it hundreds of times, so I don’t feel bad or as if I did something wrong.

The Slowrunner for your time(Yes, that’s dust in the background), and bonus Defender.

Nibby > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:02

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mmm oldsmobiles

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Nibby 04/10/2016 at 20:03

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It’s super fancy. Almost as fancy as the 944 that was sitting where the Defender is.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:11

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Once had an old man scream at me to slow down when I was doing 20 in a 25...

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/10/2016 at 20:14

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I’ve had that happen before.

HammerheadFistpunch > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:18

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I get that every few years, usually someone frantically doing the over-exajurated “slow down!” Arm wave/mouth as im doing 25 in a 25

shop-teacher > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/10/2016 at 20:19

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I once had a woman yell at me to slow down when I was idling down the street dragging the brakes (it was Haloween).

shop-teacher > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:19

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Some people need to lighten the shit up.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > shop-teacher 04/10/2016 at 20:20

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Like they’ve never gotten a little sideways on a gravel road before. This is the South, it’s a rite of passage.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > HammerheadFistpunch 04/10/2016 at 20:21

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Yeah, I’ve had that happen before.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > shop-teacher 04/10/2016 at 20:22

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These are the people who sit on their porches with pre-moistened genitals, praying that someone steps on their lawn so they yell at teh youthz

shop-teacher > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:22

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Pretty sure it's state law that you must break it loose in the gravel.

shop-teacher > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/10/2016 at 20:24

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Yep, without a doubt.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > shop-teacher 04/10/2016 at 20:24

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It’s not like I’m making South Carolina’s roads worse. In fact, I’m carving a path for people to avoid pot holes.

shop-teacher > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:25

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Such a public servant you are :)

Gone > HammerheadFistpunch 04/10/2016 at 20:36

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Been there. .My old Dakota had the 5.2L/NV3500 (4.01 1st) with 3.92s. Took a right turn (stop sign) and drove ~150ft to another stop sign while leaving it in 1st (lazy). Ran it to ~4000rpm (~22mph) in a 30 zone. Got absolutely screamed at - “SLOW THE HELL DOWN!!!!”; by a lady walking on the sidewalk. 4000rpm for the Magnum 5.2 does sound world ending, but still, so much under the speed limit. Or maybe she was concerned I was overreving the 5.2...

Flyboy is FAA certified insane > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:37

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I had a guy do that once. He was a hiker and we were just screwing around on the fire roads. He must’ve heard us and came sprinting out of woods at my truck. Damn near hit the idiot as he ran in front of me, because I wasn’t planning on stopping.

HammerheadFistpunch > Gone 04/10/2016 at 20:45

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Hey! Leave those main bearings alone! Maniac

1111111111111111111111 > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:50

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I had a neighbor that would put cones, and once a beer keg in the road to slow people down.

yitznewton > 1111111111111111111111 04/10/2016 at 20:50

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Was it at least a full beer keg??

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > 1111111111111111111111 04/10/2016 at 20:51

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I would just run them over.

His Stigness > HammerheadFistpunch 04/10/2016 at 20:52

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Oh man I love that! If I were an angrier person, I’d throw something at them.

1111111111111111111111 > yitznewton 04/10/2016 at 20:52

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Nope. But it took less than 30 for someone to stop and take it.

1111111111111111111111 > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:53

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I waited for someone to try and slalom them. Didn’t happen tho.

Keith O'Toole > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 20:56

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As someone who lives in the middle of a lot of gravel roads, I’m always careful not to unnecessarily throw gravel (stopping, starting, or turning) because I know that those roads get maintenance every five or ten years and once they rut the surface quality goes down hill fast. Sounds like the person was butthurt at the noise and assumed speed, but tearing up a gravel road by tearing down it isn’t cool.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Keith O'Toole 04/10/2016 at 21:05

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Bedrock is already exposed, it’s already ruined. It’s not hurting anything.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > Keith O'Toole 04/10/2016 at 21:06

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Plus, due to the amount of unpaved roads in the area, they grade them fairly often.

Somethin' 'bout a truck > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 21:06

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What’s funny is that this happens in the county for the most part.. but get in the city and your getting run over if your not going 15 or more over...

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > 1111111111111111111111 04/10/2016 at 22:34

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You have a Miata, that is your job.

LOREM IPSUM > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 22:59

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It’s 2016. Why aren’t these roads paved yet? 200+ years to git-r-dun and it’s like the damn Flintstones south of the mason-dixon line. (No disrespect intended toward my friends to the south.)

1111111111111111111111 > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 23:25

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I would now. Back then I had a vw tapass 2.0. I was lucky if it ran.

Die-Trying > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/10/2016 at 23:57

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next time give a big friendly wave back at the guy. but it has to be big enough that the other guy feels obligated to wave back.

JQJ213- Now With An Extra Cylinder! > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/11/2016 at 00:14

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Just had this yesterday coming home from work

I was on my street and drive past an old guy in his driveway. He starts flailing his arms and starts mouthing and holding up “3" “0" then gets in the middle of the road to read my license plate.

I was doing 32. And have the dashcam to prove it.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > LOREM IPSUM 04/11/2016 at 06:44

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I grew up in Alabama, and we had two unpaved roads that I knew of within 10 miles of me. Florida used them just to connect one road to another in an unpopulated area. South Carolina uses them everywhere. It’s because they piss away their money to Jesus causes.

Dru > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/11/2016 at 10:04

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Live in South Carolina. Can confirm.

Dead_Elvis, Inc. > 1111111111111111111111 04/11/2016 at 22:03

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I have a neighbor that puts out cones, plastic pots, etc to hold parking spaces. We have no parking restrictions in our neighborhood, nor parking issues generally, most of us park in our driveways, yet she always has at least 2 spaces blocked off. There’s absolutely no need to mark her space like this.

Every so often, because of that, I like to park as close to her driveway as possible.

She drives an X5, standard-issue non-functioning turn signals.

Dead_Elvis, Inc. > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 04/11/2016 at 22:05

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You’re a damned Robin Hood of gravel, redistributing from high spots to low!

Dead_Elvis, Inc. > LOREM IPSUM 04/11/2016 at 22:08

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I can think of hundreds, if not thousands, of miles of absolutely delightful gravel/dirt road in New England and the Pacific Northwest that would be ruined if paved, simply because of the additional traffic they would support.

It’s not just a southern thing.